Not The Onion. Following a scathing speech against Trump's nominee for Attorney General, Senate Majority leader Mitch McConnell said Senator Elizabeth Warren had "impugned the motives and conduct of our colleague from Alabama," violating the so-called 'Rule 19'. By a vote of 49-43, Senator Warren was then barred from speaking on the floor until Senator Sessions nomination debate is complete (likely tomorrow evening).
In a slight bit of irony, a Republican Representative from the state of Kentucky, Thomas Massie, introduced H.R. 899, a bill written to abolish the Department of Education in it's entirety, on the same day that Vice President Pence cast the unprecedented, tie-breaking vote to confirm that department's new Secretary, Betsy DeVos.
Apparently Massie is "in to the whole brevity thing" as the entire bill consists of a single sentence:
"The Department of Education shall terminate on December 31, 2018."
President Trump is frustrated, that is clear. His cabinet remains half (or more) empty as the third week of his reign begins, and he has only one 'thing' to blame...
It is a disgrace that my full Cabinet is still not in place, the longest such delay in the history of our country. Obstruction by Democrats!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 8, 2017
Stanford University started the week off with two elite liberal inspirationalists to help the tender psyches of turtleneck wearing "compliant and unawares" climb back from the depths of despair. I imagine that miserable couple on the plane to Portland were in attendance - both wearing jeans and faux-buckle loafers with no socks. In a sermon to the fractured cult of Jobs on Monday, Justice Ginsburg put down her antique ivory ear-trumpet to let the world know she wants to eradicate the electoral college, and people need to be more charitable.