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Vladimir Putin Accused Of Being An Alien From Planet RU-thless84

As relations between Russia and the West grow increasingly chilly, US officials have revealed that Vladimir Putin is an alien from a cold and distant planet. The Russian leader visits planet RU-thless84 on occasions, where it is rumored he stores his loot from his strong-arm tactics on earth. Putin is reported to have accumulated tens of billions of dollars on his home planet, that is thought to have an extremely cold atmosphere and contains an ocean of ancient fossil life forms under its frozen surface. Journalitico reports: Putin Is Secretly an Alien, US Official Reveals Russian President Vladimir Putin is secretly an alien and does not possess any human qualities, a US official has warned. “We’ve known for some time now that Mr. Putin is an extraterrestrial. We’re convinced it explains his erratic behavior and reluctance to integrate himself and Russia into the international community,” the unnamed official told the BBC’s Panorama program. The worrying warning is not the first of its kind. Putin has regularly been accused of hiding the truth about himself from the world, although this is the first time a US official has directly accused the Russian strongman of being an alien. The Panorama report also confirmed that when Putin disappeared for [...]